Your ego’s tendency is to keep things as they are, no matter how bad they may be. God says: “let go of the past and make room for something that honours you more deeply.” You are afraid to do that because there is no guarantee that the new will be any better than the old. You’d rather hold onto the old and invite the new in at the same time. That is the inevitable Catch-22. The new cannot come in until the old is released. When you are attached to the past, you cannot move forward toward the future. And your experience of the present is one of deadlock.
Letting go of the past is never easy. Yet it is the only act that brings the presence of God (substitute grace, if you need to) into your life. When you let go of what used to be and accept what is, the universe instantly moves to support you. The deeper your let-go is, the more resources rush to your side.
It is the nature of the ego to become attached to the past. It is the nature of the ego to project the past forward into the future, to meet the new with the conceptual nets that would tame it and make it conform to yesterday’s experience. There is nothing new in this. It is simply the movement of fear which resists anything new.
It is important to see how that fear operates in your life. It is important to realize how you have become attached to your previous experience and resist anything new that wants to come into your life.
When you hold onto your experience or use it to interpret the present experience, you “take control” of your life, and push God (grace) away. When you surrender your ideas about the way things should be, let go of the past, and open to the future, you invite God back into your life.